I'll Take This Government Contract

Local swimmers have gotten a court order forcing the City of San Diego to chase away the seals from the Scripps children's pool in La Jolla.  But it is not my intention to blog on that specifically, but on this bit:

The city said it would blast recordings of barking dogs to scare away the pesky pinnipeds at the cost of $688,000 a year. San Diego cannot use force because the seals are a federally protected marine species.

Please, oh please can I get paid $688,000 a year to play loud recordings on the beach?  I have not even cracked a spreadsheet on this, but I am betting I can turn a profit on that.

7 Comments

  1. JB:

    Come on. Certainly Excel has a formula for that.

  2. Evil Red Scandi:

    Wow, and I thought the City of San Diego was an ant's hair away from bankruptcy because of an insanely rich pension scheme for city employees. I'm amazed that they're so versatile at wasting money. Well, not really. I just wish I was amazed. I'm fantasizing about it now.

  3. Jim Collins:

    I've got $20 that says the barking dogs recordings will only work for a little while. Then where is San Diego at? Seals are rapidly becoming the new alligators. They now hunt alligators in Florida, how long before seals are put back on the hunting list? Probably never. Unlike alligators, seals are considered cute, except for the Coronado Island variety.

  4. smurfy:

    Wait, you've been blasting the minimum wage for several days now and yet you want to go and bid on a contract where you will have to pay prevailing wage? Even in a down economy with high unemployment the government can't contract for cheap labor. And then there's the prevailing wage bid bonds you'll have to post and , oh wait, is Coyote a female minority?

    How long before the barking dogs drive the kids away?

  5. feeblemind:

    I would say Jim Collins is quite right, the barking dog deterrent won't be effective for long. I didn't know seals were so numerous that they were becoming a nuisance. Living in Nebraska, I was still under the impression that there might not be more than 6 seals left in the entire world.

  6. Captain Obviousness:

    Just set up a motion sensor controlled valve hooked up to a high pressure hose. If a seal gets close it gets squirted with high pressure water. But that might cost dozens, maybe HUNDREDS of dollars at Home Depot.

  7. tomw:

    You all forgot the real cost of doing business in CA. Eco rights groups, animal rights groups, and lawyers. The legal defense cost to be able to drive the seals away has to be significant. Perhaps half of the budgeted funds, no?
    You cannot fart in CA without someone accusing you of destroying mother Gaia. I left.

    tomw